


Harry Potter and the Chamber of Whipping it Out

by tbmd1066



Series: Hot Potato Prompts [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, magically influenced compulsive stripping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-01
Updated: 2014-07-01
Packaged: 2018-02-06 23:14:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1876128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tbmd1066/pseuds/tbmd1066
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Harry Potter and the Chamber of Whipping it Out

“The Chamber of Whipping it Out?” Harry asked.

“What the hell does that mean?” “Maybe it means whipping out your wallet!” Ron said.

“You have like, twenty brothers, and I’m an only kid, and I know exactly how wrong you are.” Hermione said condescendingly. She did not however, tell her idiot friends what she knew the Chamber of Whipping it Out really was. Hermione was surprisingly mature for her twelve years, and as a Gryffindor, completely up for the adventure. Since the Chamber of Whipping it Out _technically_ wasn’t out of bounds, and it wasn’t _technically_ dangerous, and Hermione was bizarrely up for seeing her best friends’ penises, when the boys decided they wanted to try and find it, she agreed.

However, none of them had figured on Draco finding out and telling the Gryffindor prefect and the Headmaster about it.

So there they were, probably the three best-known troublemakers in Hogwarts, all standing together with their respective trousers and skirts and pants around their feet, genitalia proudly out for all to see.

As Draco stepped into the room to gloat, snivel about his father etc., he randomly ripped his pants of, and then simply stood there staring, mouth wide open in shock.

Percy followed him into the Chamber to yell at him, and continued yelling about inappropriate conduct even as he ripped his own pants off.

“Percy!” Ron shouted at his brother. “Yours has got a ring on it!”

Percy stood there in horror as Professor Dumbledore chuckled quietly to himself, wisely choosing to remain in the doorway.

Draco suddenly, for the first time in his life, felt a sudden but powerful attraction to the ginger boy. He approached him, slowly at first.

“R-Ron...” He asked slowly, then blushed and shook his head furiously. “WEASLEY! I mean Weasley! Is it okay if...” His voice trailed off as he eyed Ron from head to toe.

“I just feel this...I...the idea of some friction sounds appealing right about now.” Both of the boys were bright red. Well, Ron even more so than usual. Hermione cleared her throat. “Now really boys, is this the time for...well, that....”

Harry stood lonely in the corner, overwhelmed with jealousy. Draco had all of this attention, attention that HE wanted. He glanced over to the doorway, where Percy and Dumbledore were standing together.

Percy had slowly begun to eyeball Dumbledore, gently licking his own lips as he looked up and down the man. He may have been old but...Percy did prefer people who were more mature than most of his classmates. Dumbledore certainly fit that bill. He could not help but admire the silver hair of the old man, neatly combed and braided, falling nearly to his feet. He looked so timeless, so full of wisdom. Percy was sure that he had be full of wisdom in a variety of areas, areas that stretched outside of the realm of magic. He had of course heard many rumors about the old man....

Percy approached Dumbledore slowly, not sure how to tell the old man how he was feeling. Before he could say anything, Dumbledore raised his hand.

“I already know what you want. And I am happy to provide.”

Dumbledore lifted his long wizard robes to reveal his massive, sagging basilisk, at which point Harry turned away and began to gag. Percy was disappointed, but tried not to show it on his face.

Percy approached the headmaster slowly, feeling as if he was going to his doom. He tried to keep his hands from shaking as he gripped the elderly man’s sagging basilisk in his hand. Ron threw up in the corner. Harry and Draco followed shortly after. Hermione stared on in disgust.

Tears came to Percy’s eyes as the reality of the situation hit him. That he was jerking off a hundred-year-old wizard in front of his twelve-year-old brother and his friends. As the headmaster came in Percy’s hand with an elderly sigh Hermione looked at the boys.

Percy knew that it was a sad handjob and there was no escaping the awkwardness, so he decided to slowly back away into the darkness of the chamber.

Harry had stopped gagging now that the littler ordeal between Percy and Dumbledore had finished. Dumbledore sat down, somewhat exhausted, and seemed to fall asleep.

Hermione had started giving the sex talk to Ron and Draco, who were suddenly much less interested in one another, and more interested in following in Dumbledore’s footsteps and simply falling asleep. Hermione’s teaching had now moved on past sex, and she was going on about something in the muggle world called SATs, and how many of the questions were racially biased, and comparing this to muggleborn/pureblood prejudices.

Harry, disappointed overall with how things had gone in the Chamber of Whipping it Out, sadly masturbated in the corner. When he finished, he too fell asleep.

With Hermione talking, Percy now totally vanished and everyone else sleeping, none of them noticed the door to the chamber seal slowly behind them. It was never opened again, nor were any of those poor folks ever seen again. They do say, however, that if you enter the school on the 30th of June each year and go to the spot where the chamber was supposedly located, and chant a whole bunch of wizardy and latiny spells, a door will open. Inside, you will find many sad ghosts, moaning. Tragically beautiful.

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Very sorry.
> 
> The cards:  
> Genital piercings  
> Friction  
> A sad handjob  
> Racially biased SAT questions.


End file.
